Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Thoughts.

I'm in the middle of writing an essay, but I was clicking around on Facebook and for some reason decided to click on the page of a friend's friend who passed away in recent months. Someone had recently left a message on his wall, telling him that he still feels that he's there, and that he misses him everyday. His sister commented on the post. She must always check his page. She must miss him very much.

I had been to the same school as them both for a few years, quite a few years back, and although he seemed like the type of person I'd like to befriend, it never happened, because I'm the passive type when it comes to socialising. Fast forward several years and we were all at the same university, with mutual friends. Although we all recognise each other by face, none of us acknowledge the other even with a smile. I guess I am guilty of looking through or past people who I am not officially acquainted to. Gone are the days when strangers meet the eyes of passersby and smile - society has changed, and I have simply changed with it. I figured that since we have mutual friends, we were likely to cross paths in the future. More years passed by, and one of them married a friend of mine. How small the world is, I thought. Surely it wouldn't be long until we were finally introduced to each other. A few months later, he was.. gone.

How strange life is. How short and fragile. Two siblings of mine had at least one friend who passed away in recent years. My own aunt has terminal cancer and the doctors are just hoping she'd see it through to her birthday this year. They aren't optimistic though. Her birthday is on March 21. I almost died myself on two unexpected occasions in the past 2 years, but managed to pull through. I'm sure a part of me had died though. Misery and despair does that to you. It ages you a lot too. I feel like a grandma already, and according to people around me, I act like one too, with my old fashioned ideals, attitudes and hobbies, as well as my love for the fashion of the 1800s and vintage styles in general (that has always been true for me though).

I guess the point I'm trying to make is that in this unpredictable world that we live in, where anything can happen at anytime, we have to be constantly prepared. To do that, we must dig deep inside ourselves, and identify what really is important to us. Only then can we be at peace with ourselves and know how to live with no regrets.

Okay, back to my essay now. Giving a sermon was not my intention, sorry!

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